Everybody is growing up and becoming REAL adults, and along with that comes babies. It seems like several of my good friends have jumped on the Grown Up train and have popped out kids. Just last Sunday my awesome friends Jason and Lola gave birth to our new defender of the universe, Bruce. In addition, a few weeks ago another set of friends just gave birth to a little stallion named Lincoln. Truman and Lincoln, presidential friends FOREVER!
What to do with all these bad ass baby boys? Start a baby gang of course! Truman gets to be the leader because he is the oldest, and will probably end up being the smallest. He will be like Luther from The Warriors, but with baby bottles on his fingers instead of beer bottles. “Baaabbbies, come out an plaaaaaaay“. I will do my best to ensure he will not meet Luther’s fate. For those of you who have not seen The Warriors, don’t watch it. Because then you won’t like it, and I will judge you.
The baby gang can be called The Cribs and they can rock these onesies:
It is totally a solid plan! Fisher Price makes shivs, right? The Cribs will spend their time loitering outside of Gymboree drinking apple juice out of paper bag covered sippy cups and harassing passersby with insulting baby babble. Let me know if you are interested in joining The Cribs. You have to be jumparooed in. Poop in poop out.