Happy Janksgiving!

Ah yes, it is Thanksgiving.  The time of year when the entire nation gathers with loved ones, fill their bellies and hearts with so much warmth and goodness, it feels as if they will burst, spilling frothy, steaming, love filled guts out onto the cold kitchen floor.  WARM FUZZIES!

Of course, Thanksgiving is a time to reflect on what you are thankful for.  If you must know, I am thankful that this is happening:


and I am thankful that David Bowie knew Iggy Pop and made music with both him and Brian Eno. Seriously, how great is this:

So good.  I am also thankful that I fit into a few of my prepregnancy jeans, and yeah, yeah, yeah I am thankful for my beautiful son and husband and stuff.

Thanksgiving has always been a super relaxed holiday for me.  I’ve never stressed out about it and I always have a good time, whether it’s a rag tag Thanksgiving with just friends, the whole family thing down in Corpus, or it’s just me and Chad.  Our first Thanksgiving as a couple was in LA, after we’d been married just a little over a month.  I decided to make Thanksgiving dinner for all of our friends.  It was fairly uneventful, we just had turkey, mashed potatoes, corn,  the traditional holiday pomelo, and crescent rolls.  Speaking of crescent rolls *TANGENT ALERT*, every year they show that irritating commercial with two dudes fighting over the last crescent roll.  “I’ll get my ruler”, “No, THIS is half.”

I never cared for this commercial, and I think it is stupid.  So I was surprised to see that this year, much to my chagrin, Pillsbury made a new commercial, with new actors, AND THE SAME DAMN PREMISE! BUT GOD, I LOVE CRESCENT ROLLS.

Anyways, my first grown up Thanksgiving was a success, thanks in part to some performance enhancing drugs.  The only mishap that happened was when I went to check the turkey, which was cooking in my friend Billy’s oven because mine was full,  Billy’s oven racks were put in backwards and when I went to baste the turkey, I pulled the rack completely out.  The turkey went sliding off the rack and I had to catch it in my arms before it hit the floor.  I may have scorched my skin a bit, but I saved Thanksgiving y’all.

So proud, so young, so skinny.

My second grown up Thanksgiving went just as smooth.  I decided to make a turkey log instead of an entire turkey because I hate deboning the turkey at the end of the night. (I’m more into BONING the turkey, if you know what I mean.)  Everyone enjoyed it except for Chad because he thought the concept of a turkey log was gross, which is a fair assessment if you think about it.

Some of my favorite grown up Thanksgivings were spent with my befri, Bridget.  She would make a delicious apple cider and we would get super shwasted  before the turkey was even done.

Totally sober.

One year while we were in our post gorge haze, we started riffing about Billy Joel delivering terrible medical diagnoses via song. “You’re gonna get a big shot…”, “Only the good (and you) die young!”, “I don’t care what they say anymore you have caaaancer.” Yes, we are terrible people.  That same year I made a really delicious apple caramel pie, so I am abolished of any sin.

Now, let me ask you this-have you ever heard of a Mock Apple Pie?  No?  Well let me expound on this abomination.  It is an apple pie, that eschews apples and instead has RITZ crackers as the filling.  Apparently they used to eat it during the Great Depression or something when they couldn’t afford apples. But they could afford Ritz.  I’m pretty sure Ritz cost more than apples, but who knows what things were like during that crazy time.  I made this pie.  It actually wasn’t terrible, but it was wrong in many, many ways.  Luckily since this was at a family Thanksgiving, there were other pies to be ravaged.  I just made it on a lark because I was curious cat.   If I was in charge of dessert and Mock Apple Pie was the sole pie I provided, I would surely be exiled from my family,and forced to find a new family in a completely different state.

AHHH, misty water colored memories.  Today, I am working in the evening at the UT football game with mah gurls, LD and Kayrun, so I am having a lovely little Thanksgiving lunch with Chad and Truman.  This is the first year that Truman gets to eat turkey and all the fixings and I’m excited for him to pass out in a tryptophan daze.  I enjoyed reminiscing, it made me feel grateful or whatever for all the good times I’ve had. I hope everyone has a lovely Thanksgiving filled with apple cider, inappropriate jokes, and crescent rolls.

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2 thoughts on “Happy Janksgiving!

  1. Steve says:

    I hate apple pie anyway. But what about pumpkin pie? Don’t tell me that’s just a Canadian thing! Pumpkin pie is the greatest!

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